“This is the most 80s thing ever.”

Just when you thought teenagers couldn’t be even more asshole-ish, someone decided to give them fangs – and mullets. These vampires aren’t going to high school to pick up girls way younger than them – if they ever did set foot in a high school, it’d be to pause their motorbikes in a cool 80s pose before riding away after causing an incredible amount of mess for the poor janitor.

Teen rebels gotta rebel, right?

So grab your copy of Peter Pan, prepare for jokes about bat nipples and weird poster choices, and keep an eye on a closet full of beavers because we’re headed to the mullet – I mean murder – capital of the world.